- Friend 1: omg! He literally JUST told you that was a tazer!
- Friend 2: yeah, I know. I wanted to know how it worked.
- Friend 1: ......... so how much does your hand hurt?
waking up to cuddles and spanks
then cooking breakfast together to ozzy
is a good way to start your saturday
- dethcola: releasing dementors onto the hogwarts grounds to catch sirius is like if a school hired a private military company made up entirely of wolves with AK47s strapped to their backs to hunt a random uncle in a custody battle
you tell that man you want a cupcake
that man will get you a damn cupcake